He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
even my farts smell like vagina
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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