i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Everclear isn't food dammit
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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