i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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