Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
