If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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