one two three fourrrrnication!
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
