Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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