Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
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