I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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