I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
These tits shall not be calmed
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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