What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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