I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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