FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
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