I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
