just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
i now understand why vodka
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
