there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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