Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
you made out with another girl for some wings
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
