can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
