I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Just high enough for therapy.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
