who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
