At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize