did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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