Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
