i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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