i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
