he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
