when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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