my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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