Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize