TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
