3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize