this just has baby written all over it
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
then he tried to convert me to islam
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
