I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
