he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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