I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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