So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
