I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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