It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Actions speak louder than pants.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
