My hand turned me down
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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