Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
