I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
