Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize