Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
