Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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