So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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