I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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