He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
