Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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