i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
operation have a gay friend backfired
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
