im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
