I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
